|
Ten Essential Online Dating Safety Tips
1. Trust Your Gut Instinct
Your instinct is a powerful medium for knowing when something
doesn't feel right. It is also a great way to measure when
to move forward with someone and when to turn and run. As
you read profiles, responses to emails, have phone conversations,
and meet in person your instincts help tell you if something
is "right" or if something is out of alignment.
The "out of alignment" message is your cue to be
careful, back off, or proceed with extreme caution. Trust
your gut instinct, it's the most powerful psychological tool
you have at your disposal.
2. Don't Provide Personal Information Too Soon
Your home phone number and full name provide easy ways to track
who you are and where you live. Armed with just your home
phone number, a person can easily gain access to your income
information, home address, and even learn the value of your
home. Armed with your first and last name, a person can do
searches to determine quite a bit of information on you -
where you work, what you do, and even what your home phone
number is. So in the initial stages of communication, guard
your personal information. As far as phone communication,
see the next tip.
3. Use a Free Email Account
If you decide to move your communication from the anonymous
email feature provided by the majority of online dating services
then provide an email address that isn't your regular one.
Sign up for a free Yahoo!, Hotmail, or Gmail account that
you use just for online dating. Don't put your full name
in the From field - only your first name or something else.
This protects you from a person being able to search your
normal email address to find out more information about you.
4. Use a Cell Phone or Anonymous Phone Service to Chat
When it's time to move your communication to the next level
(talking on the phone), never give out your home phone number.
Either provide a cell phone number, use Skype to communicate,
or use an anonymous phone service. It's just an added protection
barrier until you get to know the person better.
5. Beware of Married People
It's unfortunate, but a lot of married people do use online
dating services. They'll even go as far as to meet people.
A few years ago, MSNBC reported that a study found that up
to 30% of people using online dating services are married!
To help you in determining whether a person is married or
not, read the Online Dating Magazine article, "Staying
Clear of Married Men".
6. Look for Questionable Characteristics in Your Communication
As you chat via email and on the phone you may be able to start
to pick out characteristics of the other person. Are they
controlling? Do they seem to anger easily? Do they avoid
some of your questions? These can be questionable characteristics
that tell you it's time to move on.
7. Ask for a Recent Photo
There's nothing wrong in asking someone if their photos are
recent. If they don't have a photo, request a recent one.
It's important for you to get a good look at the person you
may eventually meet. Plus your instincts from your communications
and their photos may provide you with valuable insight into
the person. Plus, if they tell you the photo is recent and
you meet and see a major difference, then you'll know the
person lied and can cut the date short. If a person lies
about their photo or profile then that is a red flag to no
longer pursue the relationship.
8. Stick With Paid Online Dating Services
Free online dating services provide a greater opportunity for
potentially dangerous individuals. They don't ever have to
provide a credit card or other information that identifies
them. There is some truth to the saying, "you get what
you pay for".
9. Don't Get a False Sense of Security
Some online dating services claim to offer "background
checks" and when signing up for such a service you may
find it easier to let your guard down. Don't. Laws differ from
state-to-state when it comes to background checks and there
are even several states where checks can't be effectively performed.
Because of the inconsistency, criminals/wrong doers can and
do get into services that do "background checks".
Never let your guard down.
10. Meet in a Public Place for Your First Meeting
When it's time to schedule that first exciting face-to-face
meeting, arrange to meet in a public place and provide your
own transportation. Your initial meeting will tell you a
lot about the other person, including whether or not he/she
lied in their profile. Your gut instincts will kick in. Never
accept an offer to be picked up at your house. Make sure
that a friend knows where you are at and who you are with.
By following these tips, you'll help protect yourself from
being an easy prey to someone who may have ulterior motives.
With an average of 100+ marriages a day from online dating,
you can see that the experience can be both safe and rewarding.
Keep it safe!
|